Milk Comes From Cows!

My darling preschoolers bring me so much joy and laughter. There are a hundred funny and joyful moments during any given today. This sweet little conversation was the "gem of wisdom" for today.

The scene takes place in my music class with a precocious group of three-year-olds.

Tyler: Miss Mindy. Do you have a baby in your tummy?
Me: Yes! I'm going to have a little girl named Eden. She'll be here around Thanksgiving time.
Sam: Miss Mindy, whatcha gonna feed your baby?
Me: I'll feed her milk.
Sam: Oh, from your breast?
Me: (Flustered, not wanting to explain breast feeding during music time) Um....well..... I'll be feeding her...er,um, mommy milk....from my......body.
Presley: (Exasperated) Sam! (Rolling eyes) Milk comes from cows, silly!

 

 

Gotta love innocence, and correct anatomical vocabulary.



3rd Trimester News

Eight weeks ago we received the news that our new little one is a girl. All major body systems and measurements were in perfect, healthy working condition.  We also received news of placenta prévia that was blocking my cervix, presenting a risk of hemorrhage to me if a normal, vaginal delivery were to take place. And lastly, we learned that an echogenic intracardiac focus (EIF) was present in Eden's heart. An EIF presents no risk to Eden's health, but basically tells us there is a 1% chance that she could have a chromosomal abnormality, most likely Downs Syndrome. 

Today we had the fourth, and what I thought would be final ultrasound. We found out great things: 

* Eden is still a girl. I've had crazy pregnancy dreams that I've given birth to a boy, and the occasional puppy. I've never had an ultrasound this late in a pregnancy, so when a tech tells me a gender, I nod and trust them, but today I clearly saw lady parts. It's a girl!!!

* I found out that my little lady currently weighs 2.7 pounds, and is measuring perfectly for a December 2nd due date. 

* Baby girl is flexible! She had her foot on her forehead for part of the ultrasound. She will be the next Shannon Miller, look out world!

* She has hair! So far I've given birth to Isaac's skullet, and Hope's sweet little cue ball head. Maybe this is my chance to have a baby that has thick hair. 

* She looks like Hope. The ultrasound tech turned on the 4D and let us see her. She was so sweet. Her big sister squealed about how cute she was, and I reacted as I usually do- with happy tears.



* Isaac was mostly enamored with the blue gel on my tummy. "Mom! I really like that blue goo on your tummy!" He said excitedly. 

* My placenta moved to a safe 3cm away from the opening of my cervix, and Eden is head down, which means that I can proceed with my heart's desire of a normal delivery. Thank you Jesus. 

* Despite a healthy heart rate of 144 the EIF was still present. It was not as bright as bone tissue and was not as bright as before- both good signs. Often an EIF will stay until birth, but it will sometimes disappear in the third trimester. But the fact that it is still there has earned me another ultrasound in four weeks. I'm praying A) that it is gone, B) that if it still present that it is not a sign of any issue, C) that God will prepare my heart and my family if there is an issue. Regardless, I believe that Eden is exactly as God wants her to be, and if Downs is part of his great plan for her then I  honored that He chose our family for her. We all love her so much already. And I'm grateful that there is no threat to her health or life. There's a 99% chance that all is fine. Good odds if you ask me. 

All in all, it was a great encouraging visit. I can't believe that she'll be here in 12 weeks or less. We're so excited to hold her, kiss her, and make her part of us. If you would please pray that God would take care of Eden's EIF and give us faith and courage as we wait to meet her. 

Maternity Skinny Jeans: An Oxymoron

As a lover of fall- I am so happy with the recent trend of long (read: covering the hiney) cardigans, tunics, and baggy sweaters, paired with leggings or skinny jeans and boots. (English teacher friends: I am almost sure I just committed several punctuation crimes. Forgive me.)

From time to time I enjoy shopping and cruising pinterest for what the young folks are wearing, even though I am usually wearing a mom-i-form that is closer to yoga pants and t-shirts from high school. I am not super stylish, but I think I have occasional cute days with my limited resources and budget.

It is late August and I am due to have my last ever baby in December. Here in Oklahoma the only thing certain about our weather is its unpredictability. But I am hopeful that it will eventually cool off enough for me to want to wear my fall staple of skinny jeans and boots. So I purchased a pair of dark indigo maternity skinny jeans and black leggings online.

I was so excited to try them both on when they came in yesterday. I tried on the super soft, full panel, black leggings first and instantly declared them my new favorite pants. Soft, comfy, perfect with long tees and a jacket. Good to dress up for and evening out, or to kick around the house in. In short, I was in love. Pregnancy perfection. Naturally I was excited to proceed to my skinny jeans which were sure to be a hit.

Note: I own several other pairs of jeans, pants, and skinny jeans that are the same brand and size. They fit just fine. No problem.

I put on the jeans and attempted to pull them up. Attempted. They got stuck on my pregnant ham-hock thighs. Allegedly they were stretchy, but I found them not to budge at all. The top of the pants stopped somewhere around my hiney crack. They were so freakishly tight. So I made the choice to do whatever any self respecting woman would do. I pulled up the navy, stretchy, belly covering material and went to the kitchen to show my husband.

This is mean, but sometimes it is fun to wear something that you know is heinous to watch the man you love writhe uncomfortably as he tries not to say anything stupid. The conversation went something like this:

Me: Honey, do you like my new jeans?

Ryland: (Eyes huge, fear covering his face.) Those are cute.

Me: Are you serious? These are so tight that I look like someone who belongs in a "people of Wal-Mart" picture. I'm returning them.

Ryland: Ok. Thank goodness!

Y'all, they were an abomination. Skin tight with a major muffin top. Bad. Blech. Vom. Whatever you are imagining, it was worse.

Then I danced in them. It was a twerking/booty dance hybrid, except pregnant, and not sexy. My people laughed and then I crisco'd myself down enough to peel off the jeans so that I could breathe deeply again. Sweet freedom.

I will be returning them post-haste.

I told my sweet husband that I was planning to blog about this unfortunate experience, to which he timidly replied, "I don't really know how to say this, but, you aren't going to post a picture are you?".

"I'm too vain for that." I said. He exhaled, clearly relieved. And I threatened to punch him if he ever spoke of "the jeans" ever again.

Why couldn't I have been pregnant when gaucho pants were in style? Stretchy, loose, glorious, perfect for achieving a non-muffin-top style. Please ladies, for the love of future preggos everywhere, let's bring back the gauchos.

Maternity Skinny Jeans. Oxymoron.

What I Needed Most

The last 2 days have been sad. Some of the hardest minutes and hours that I've dealt with in awhile. I miss Lexus. I miss the noises that she made. I miss her bossy bark. I  miss the way she'd pace around the dog food bowls looking for left overs often prompting Sadie, my slow eater to growl at her. I miss the adoring way she looked at me. I miss touching her. There's a hole and I have spilled many tears, especially as I watch my kids and dogs notice her absence.

But at the kid's bedtime, after Hope and her Daddy bumped heads during the neck "snark" portion of the bedtime routine, I crawled into a tiny toddler bed with my crying 2-year-old. She rested her on my chest and I rubbed her back until she started to snore. I smelled her hair and thought about how small she is and how quickly she's growing. She'll be three in just 2 months, a big sister in four. And almost on cue Eden started to kick the big sister who was unknowingly squishing her.

And then the tears came, followed by gratitude. Even in the midst of grief, I have so much to be thankful for. I am so thankful for that moment, in this fleeting season. Thankful for the interaction between my daughters who were completely unaware. I love that I was the only one who knew. It was like a sweet secret. All too soon Hope will outgrow her tiny toddler bed and sleeping on her Mom, and all too soon my season of childbearing will come to an end and I'll never again feel the indescribable miracle of feeling your child from the inside. It was a sacred moment that I don't ever want to forget. My two girls, such gifts, so much love.

And in that moment, that little snippet of time, I know that what I needed most was to be reminded of my blessings, my home, my daughters. And while the waves of grief and guilt come, I pray that I find only gratitude. I pray that I remember that I am motivated by and surrounded with love. And that I have been given more than I deserve.

I still miss my Lex, and I anticipate more hard days to come, but I am thankful that God always provides what I need most, moment to moment, day by day. I am thankful.