Worth Fighting For

So. In the news this week some actor, that is 51, married a .......wait for it........ 16 year old!

16?!?!?

Yes, not old enough to vote, driving only for a few weeks, can't buy alcohol or a gun, can't work full time, truant officer if not at school, still young enough to spank, 16!!! Not to mention that this pedophile is probably older than her Dad. Blech!

I am repulsed, disgusted, GROSSED out, but mostly angry. And a little confused.

1) Why is she allowed to date solo? Let alone have permission to get engaged and married. I wasn't even allowed to drive to Tulsa at 16.

2) Where is she hanging out that she would even come in contact with a 51 year old predator that would have opportunity to "woo" her into any type of romantic relationship?

3) Where is this girl's Dad? Any 51 year old trying to get into 16 year old Mindy's pants would have had bullet holes in him courtesy of Mike Harmon. My Dad helped a bully tom-cat meet the Lord just for whipping Smoky, the family cat. A pedophile would have met a worse fate, I'm afraid. Actually, any bad intentioned boy would have had a hard time getting close to me, that's what Dads are supposed to do!

In the Peasant Princess sermon series from Mars Hill church (WHICH IS AMAZING-GO LISTEN TO IT NOW!!!), Mark Driscoll talks about defending your daughters and raising sons who are defenders of women. He speaks of Solomon's wife and her young days as a sister. In Song of Solomon chapter 8, verse 9, her brothers say, "If she is a wall we will build a silver parapet upon it. If she is a door we will enclose it with cedar planks."

Basically, there are 2 types of girls: walls & doors.

Girls who are walls can stand firm against those who would do harm. They aren't easily swayed by cute, smooth talking boys. A parapet is a protective wall at the top where Dads and brothers need to protectively watch who and what might be trying to enter.

Girls who are doors are the ones who are more inclined to let trouble in. They aren't discerning about who they date. They buy into lies about where sexual boundaries are. They let in experiences that ought not happen outside of the marriage bed. For these girls the Dads and brothers need to put planks over the door to keep out 51 year old creepers. They are the defense for a girl that has trouble defending herself.

I was (and am) not perfect, but for the most part I consider myself to be a wall. And I was fortunate enough to have had a father who was pacing my parapet, prayerfully scaring away any boys who shouldn't be there.

Several girls that I love were doors- and sadly did not have Dads and brothers enclosing them with cedar planks. And the creepers came in and stole things that were precious. As a Mom, my heart breaks even more for them now. Sure- different choices could have been made, but had they been more protected, they would not have had the opportunity to make a poor choice in the first place. They were let down and paid the price in a weak moment.

As I prayed over my kids tonight. I prayed for my beautiful, bald headed, innocent, Hope. I prayed that her natural inclination would be that of a wall- a wall stronger than I ever was. And if she isn't, I pray that our family unit will defend her with all that is within us. That she won't buy into lies of "its no big deal/there are no consequences/it feels good right now". I pray that there would be a little baby boy out there in the world that will grow into a man worthy of my family's blessing in 30 or so years. :)

And I prayed for my precocious, silly, innocent, curious, Isaac. I fear for him. Statistically, boys are exposed to pornography by age 11, if not sooner. The thought that his innocence can be so easily taken makes me ill. We watched the movie Antz and had to turn it off because one ant eluded to "erotic fantasies". I refuse to allow those notions into his mind in my home. The world will have ample chances soon enough. "Boys will be boys" is not acceptable. I pray that I will be discerning about his friends, movies, and will vigilantly guard his eyes. I am so grateful that Ryland is such a great role model and champion for having pure eyes and a pure heart, he truly exemplifies what is means to love and respect a woman. I pray that Isaac will also guard and protect Hope from harmful boys, in fact he may be able to spot them better than I can. I am also praying for the girl that will be his bride someday. I pray that her family is protecting her.

I know that they are tiny. I know that I don't ever put them in harm's way. It's amazing that my kids grandparents even pass my babysitting requirements! Ok, not really, but I just don't take risks with my kids. Especially when I see things on the news about children being sexually trafficked for drugs. God help this generation!

Maybe it makes me lame, and prude, and conservative- but I want my kids to have every blessing that there is to be had in their marriages. Ryland is my one and only- I wish I had never even kissed anyone else. I wish I had saved even that only for him. I want my kid's choices to honor God, and to keep them safe. Just as my choice to wait only for Ryland honored God and kept my heart and body safe.

Apologies if this is a tmi post. My heart is a deep ocean of concerns for my kids that I have to give to God daily. I'm sorry if this has been too much "real". But it is what it is. My kids purity will always be worth fighting for.

*Happy Late Father's Day to Mike Harmon, who guarded my wall, and helped me receive the blessings of his hard work in my marriage. Thanks for fighting for me, Dad. I love you.*