It's A...........

Drumroll please (think christmas vacation style)...........It's a............... POST FROM RYLAND! Sorry to get your hopes up, but no we don't know whether our baby is going to be an nfl star or wnba player yet. We will soon though! We are going to have a 3d ultrasound done on Sept. 13th to find out the sex of our tad. So we all shall soon find out.

I am posting to ask you all to say a prayer for my prescious wife today. It is the first day of school for Edmond teachers and I know it will probably be an exhausting day for her. Just ask God to give her strength and to feel good. I know she is really excited about getting back in the classroom, but it also means being on your feet all day and dealing with crazy third graders. We have been so blessed to have you praying for us. God is so good.

This is a picture that we took at 12 weeks or so. Our friend Stephanie gave us this little baby doll that is the size of a 12 week old baby. Kinda weird, but also really amazing to think that our little tad doesn't really resemble a tadpole anymore. I think Mindy might feel like the baby looks more like this now though..............................

Just like it's Daddy. Well, thanks for reading my post. Have a great day everybody!

-Ryland-

Another One of My Crazy Dreams

This is hard to share because my emotions are still a little raw about this topic. I mentioned in my very first post how we lost my Aunt Karla the same day that we lost our third baby.

Yesterday would have been my Aunt Karla's 56th birthday. All of the firsts after losing someone are hard. I know it was especially hard for her three daughters.

I went to bed last night and she was one of the last things on my mind. During the night she visited me in my dreams. I dreamed of the "old" her. Her hair was done, her make-up was on, she was dressed in bright colors and she had her old body. She was radiant. She held my hand and we walked and talked for what seemed like hours. I don't remember much of what we said but I do remember how good it felt just to be with her again. The only thing I remember her saying was a message about her daughters that I feel is best shared with them personally.

I loved that dream. I have also dreamed of my Pa (Grandpa Corky) like this before. It is like getting to visit with an old friend for the evening. You always wake up missing them, but you know they are just on the other side of heaven. Its not far away but the journey is long for a lot of us.

I woke up and had one thought on my mind. I thought of Aunt Karla leaving us on January 31, and how I found out that I lost my baby that same day. I thought of my due date for this baby, February 4. That doesn't seem like a coincidence to me. In my mind (which is not scripture based) I think Aunt Karla got to heaven, saw my three babies instead of two and marched straight into the throne room and worked out a deal thus sending me this little one in my belly. I think it was just a cherry on top that she knew we would all be sad during that time and wanted to send some joy to us to help us all heal. Catholics believe that the saints that have gone before us intercede to the Father on our behalf. She was never canonized, but I think within our family we could all agree that she possessed a lot of saint-like qualities and I wouldn't be surprised to know that she interceded for this baby. What a great way to celebrate her first "homecoming" , with the celebration of new life. God does it like that all the time.

Please keep our family and especially my Aunt Karla's three daughters in your prayers. There are a lot of hard days still to come. But even though her body is gone, she is still with us. And as far as I am concerned, still giving gifts that are eternal.

Mindy

The Appointment 8/12/08

As you know, I had very high hopes that I would have another ultrasound today. It did not happen. BUMMITY BUM BUMMER.

Oh well.

We got to Dr. K's office. I went in and got weighed. I was not excited about stepping on the scales. Since I stopped throwing up everyday I have grown a bit of a pot belly. (Understatement) I knew I was about to get in trouble. I haven't exactly been the queen of eating healthy. Don't get me wrong, I am eating lots of fruits and veggies and drinking my water, but I am chasing those good things with lots of carb-alicious things like noodles and reese's peanut butter puffs cereal. And I feel like Tad likes those things better anyways. He is my child afterall. :) Do you think Dr. K will buy that? Anyways, I got on the scale and amazingly, I weighed the same as 4 and 1/2 weeks ago and had even lost a few ounces. I was shocked and amazed. I told the nurses that my theory is this: I puked off my butt and my muffin top and when the weight came back it all went straight to my belly. They found it quite humorous, but I really think thats what happened. I bet next time my weight gain will be in the positive.

We went to the exam room and they tested my urine, which had sickeningly been stored inside of two ziplock bags and a Wal-Mart bag inside my purse all day. I get to do this everytime, GAG. Everything looked great. My blood pressure was lower than usual. Good stuff. Dr. K came in and pressed on my belly to measure it. He said growth looked good. Then he got out a little machine that looked like a wireless lapel microphone to listen for the heartbeat. He jammed it into my fat belly. It took him too long for my comfort to find the heartbeat. I think Tad was not loving being poked with a cold microphone, so he tried to swim way back in my tummy. In reality it was probably more like 45 seconds but when you are a freaker outer such as myself, your mind starts to panic thinking that something is wrong. Well, he found it, we heard it, and he said it was good and strong. Praise the Lord.

We did not get to have an ultrasound, but Ryland asked when we could find out the sex. Dr. K said it would be at 22 weeks. That is 8 stinking weeks away! BLAH! We were disappointed but looking forward to an October surprise. Until then I can look longingly at pink and blue things and dream of dressing Tad in them.

Praise God for another good report.

Thanks again for your prayers and encouragements. I love you all.

Mindy

Update: 14 weeks, 4 days

I feel like I have been on a blogging hiatus lately and considering that I am going back to work (blerg) on Thursday my posts may be a little shorter and farther in between for a little while. August thru September are pretty exhausting in the life of a school teacher. So, my apologies, but I promise if there is any news, good or bad, I will put it on the blog as soon as I possibly can.

Where to start......

Gurt. There should have been a statewide staffing a week ago, but we haven't received a list which makes me think that probably the staffing is today. So be in prayer as we again wait to be signed up for potential Gurts. My friend Gail, from work, told me the neatest thing the other day. She talked about how she knew that God has created Tad and Gurt especially for Ryland and I, but she also talked about how God was getting Tad and Gurt ready for EACH OTHER. I have always compartmentalized the two. It made me cry, the thought of how God creates our siblings as a gift of love for us. I thought of Ryland's aunts. One who is a Tad and one who is a Gurt. They are best friends regardless of who gave birth to them. I also thought of Lane, Jilian, Hilary and Hayden. Ryland and I have irreplaceable, wonderful siblings that God blessed us with. We have such great relationships and I am so excited to watch my kids play together, laugh together, have inside jokes and maybe even get in trouble. Just another little blessing that I look forward to.

Tad. Tad has finally decided to be nice to Mommy. The second trimester has been great so far. I am amazed at how quickly my belly has grown, now that I have stopped vomiting everyday. I am still nauseated here and there but it is much much better. Even the headaches and nosebleeds have relaxed. Which for a psycho worry wort like myself, I start thinking crazy thoughts like "Ohmygosh! I am feeling too good- something must be wrong!" I know that it is NORMAL to feel good at this point but it is a constant struggle with myself. In faith, I am choosing to believe that Tad is good and happy and getting big. I look obviously pregnant all of a sudden. My secret is out even more than it was before. I have never had a belly like this before. I am in fat-girl denial right now. I really should be leaning toward maternity clothes but I just keep rubber-band tricking all my old pants, squashing them onto myself. I will be in full panel maternity clothes land in no time I'm sure, so I will be vain until my pant start digging into my chub.

Joia Gardner. Ryland's sister Jilian is pregnant also. She is due about 6 weeks ahead of me. All of Ryland's family (minus the Arkansas crew- we missed you!) gathered at his Grandma Mary's house Friday night to witness a cake cutting. Jilian and Jonathan went to the doctor Thursday to find out the sex of their baby. They asked the doctor not to tell them, but instead to write it inside a card and seal it in an envelope. They took the envelope to a bakery and asked them to bake a cake that had either a pink inside for a girl and a blue inside for a boy. They were expecting blue - after all the pencil test predicted blue and Jilian's pregnancy has been very different this time. Jilian cut the cake and pulled out a PINK piece. SO Tad and Gurt will have another sweet baby girl cousin in December. Her name will be Joia (pronounced Joy-uh). Hope I am spelling it right, Jil. Congratulations. We are thrilled for Jaisa the sequel.

Gifts. I got my first two baby gifts yesterday. The first one came at church via my friend Cindy B. she told me that she saw it at Target and had to get it, and after she got it decided that it was too cute and couldn't wait to give it to me. I opened the bag and she had bought a pink onesie that had guitars all over it. I LOVED it. If Tad is a girl I am sure there will be pictures with Daddy and his guitar. The second gift was from Flo, Shannon, Donna and Lynn- the teachers from school on my team. They bought me green burp cloths, a soft green polka dotted blanket and a Baby Einstein "Wake-Up/ Goodnight" CD for the nursery. Again, I LOVED it! I got a few gifts in my previous pregnancies, but I have long since packed those away and honestly, I have been a little afraid to get those out. There are a lot of hard memories attached to those. They represent loss in many ways. But, after my doctor's appointment tomorrow, I am bravely going to take them out and let myself feel whatever I need to feel. And then I am going to look at them as symbols of the future, and symbols of God's faithfulness and provision. I am going to believe that a baby will wear those soon.

Dr. K tomorrow- I have my next appointment tomorrow. As always, my nerves get a little fragile right before a visit. I have NO reason at all to suspect bad news. I am ready to receive all good news, but fear just gets me sometimes. I know that I am guilty of listening to that voice of doubt that whispers in my ear, I know that it is not the voice of God. I just don't quite know how to tell it to shut up! Please keep me and Ry in your prayers as we head in tomorrow for our next monthly check-up. We are also hoping that Dr. K will tell us the sex of the baby. All of my baby books say that you can see the sex at 12-13 weeks and I am almost 15 weeks. I know Dr. K will be able to see it, I just don't know if he will tell me. It is still a little risky to tell this early, but I am chomping at the bits! We'll see. I'll tell you one thing- there will be no cake party. I won't be able to wait 5 minutes before shouting it from a mountain top. Jilian and Jon have an amazing amount of restraint that I do NOT have. So stay tuned.

Back to School. I go back to work on Thursday. Again I have a few worries. I haven't been in the district all that long, and have mad some pretty major medical issues in the last two years between 3 miscarriages, one stomach flu and one regular flu. I only have enough sick leave for ONE maternity leave this year, but I do have disability that kicks in after sick days but I don't know if it covers adoptions. I know we will be fine financially, but it is scary. I am also not thrilled to be away from my class that long. I know that my kids will have a great certified sub that will take good care of everything, but I feel like I am letting people down. I never would have planned to get 2 kids in a year, and if I had tried to, it would never happen that way! - but God planned that for me, so I know it is better than any plan I could make on my own. Pray for my future students and their parents, they they will be flexible and understanding of my unique position. ON A POSITIVE NOTE: I had my most difficult class of my career last year. I just got my test scores back. I had 100% of my students pass the state test in reading. I only had 2 students not pass in math. The test scores were also the best of my career. I felt like I had won the lottery! God has shown me several times the impact that I have had on that group. I would be happy to share those things in person, they would reveal too much personal info in this platform, but God has proven again that my classroom is part of my ministry and I am ready to get back.

Love to you all! Goodbye to Summer.

Mindy

We're Back!

Hello all. Thank you so much for your prayers. I was only sick once, in Dallas, after our flight home. It was great! Just wanted to tell you that we are here and me, Ry and Tad are all doing great. Look for a new post soon. I am going to bed early tonight!