Tuesday, October 11, 2011

A Letter to the Birthday Girl



Hopey,

How is it possible that a year has passed since we first met? How did you transform from my tiny baby into such a big girl so quickly? Didn't we agree that you would go slow and stay little?

I will not be able to say all that I want in one post- there aren't enough words for me to tell you how special you are or how blessed I am that God chose me to be your Momma. How could you possibly know that I dreamed and prayed for a daughter and God answered with you- and you are more precious and wonderful than I could even have imagined?!?!?

In a year's time you have been a spring day in the middle of a two week blizzard, and a breath of cool air in two months of desert. You have been joy in the midst of sorrow, and riches in a time of want. You were a smile when there were only tears. You are north on a compass that helps me find the direction of what's important.

You are a beauty. No doubt. But your beauty is not in your sweet little wisps of blonde hair, your long eyelashes, or sparkly blue eyes. Your beauty radiates from inside- I believe that God has given you a truly lovely heart. I hope that I can help you learn how to let your little light shine. Not so that people will love you, but so that people will love who made you- so that people will know your light giver.

You have a laugh that is music! Your giggle is contagious. You are so ready to walk but just haven't quite found your feet. You explore the world with joy, you think that there is no greater treasure than digging through your bubba's toys. You love food (that's my girl!) and will try anything. You are slowly growing 5 teeth (on top of your existing 3!) that will expand the foods you can eat. You love following your bubba and imitating him in whatever way is possible. You two are best friends, a prayer answered for Momma. You can say momma, da-da, bubba, dog, and you can mimic so many cute sounds, especially giggling and fake coughing and laughing.

Tunia, my prayer for both you and your brother is that even now, God is revealing himself to you- that you are already starting to know Him and see Him at work. I pray, more than anything, that you will answer Him when He calls someday, that you love Him with all your heart, and that you'll walk with Him all the days of your life. If this is the case, I'll never have to worry. You'll be in hands that are safer than mine could ever be. I hope I can point you in that direction.

I pray that you love others. I hope that people are more precious to you than beauty or stuff. I hope you see needs in others and rush to help.

I pray that God protects you from people, illnesses, and situations that would extinguish your little light. And that God will help me to protect you as well.

Sissy, a very wise man was quoted as saying, "I didn't want perfect children, I just wanted children." (God bless you Joe Don.) And that is so true! I don't expect perfection- but I hope you will be a "try-er". And there is no mistake or flaw that could ever make me stop loving you. Ever.

You are a gift from God. You are all that I could have ever wanted in a daughter. And on your first birthday, I just hope you know that you are special, you are loved so very much, and Lord willing we will celebrate many more happy years together. I hope we make many sweet memories and that I get to be around to watch as you take your first steps, learn, fall in love with all the sweetness life has to offer, and hopefully get to experience being a mommy someday to someone as wonderful as you are.

Happy Birthday, baby. Thank you for being mine.

I love you,
Momma



So Long, Summer

(Originally written, September 4, 2011)

So Long, Summer

I go back to work tomorrow.

I am looking forward to it. I also look forward to the coolness of fall after 60 some days of 100 degree temperatures.

I have a job that I love. I have great co-workers and I feel tremendously blessed that my job allows me to be with my kids and be a mommy first.

But going back means that summer is officially gone. That always makes me nostalgic. Some of the happiest moments in my life have happened in the summer.

Growing up, my mom worked in the school system. So in the summer she was home with us. And she was fun. She made sure we were busy. She would take us to waterparks, amusement parks, zoos, ballgames, anything. She also joined us and anyone else we dragged along at our pool at home. She kept the fridge stocked, swimsuits and uniforms cleaned, and gas in the car, so that fun-having opportunities were set up for success. My Dad was a fisherman, there were many trips to our local lake in the evenings to fish. I grew to enjoy the quiet, solitude, and patience that I learned during these times. Mostly, like any little girl, I just liked the attention from my dad.

Both sets of my grandparents lived in my hometown growing up. It grieves me that my kids will never know what that is like. I will count that as one of the most precious blessings of my childhood. Anyways, there were tons of family events. There was always a lunch filled with cousins on Sunday after church. And many sporadic visits in between. My grandparents were at most of my sporting events. They were a constant sight in the background of all those memories.

I also went to Falls Creek. My mom started going as a sponsor the summer after I turned 6. I went every summer after that until I was married. God moved during those trips. Friendships were solidly built, God spoke into my life and revealed plans, and in summer 1998 I met a boy.

I went to Falls Creek with FBC Chickasha, the church where my friend Miriam was interning for the summer. Before I ever got there she told me about a boy she thought I would like.

I was immediately repulsed. The boy in question was cute, in a skinny baseball player, not smooth at all in flirting, sorta way. And he was very young, 14. Way to young for a mature 15 year old woman such as myself.

The week went on and the more we talked the more a crush grew in my heart. And at the end of the week, a very innocent, sweet, life altering kiss happened. The likes of which would never be repeated until the summer of 2005 when that skinny, immature, not smooth boy, kissed me again and made me his wife.

Summer past have brought a family trip to Alabama in 1995, the loss of my grandpa Corky and my first trip out of the country to Jamaica in the same week in 2005, the revelation of my pregnancy with Isaac in 2008, and our big move to Owasso last summer in 2010.

This present summer has been precious. Money has been tight. I did not have an income for the first summer ever. And because of cuts in Ryland's job, his bring home income is less than it was when we started here. But God is ever faithful and we have made it as we always do. This was my first summer as a mother of two. Hope started crawling, cruising, talking, and worming her way even more into the hearts of our family. Isaac enjoyed trips to Hot Springs and Branson, swimming, zoos, and playing with his friends and Grandparents. He started speaking in sentences and loving Disney movies. My time with them has been sweet. Ryland did several camps and got me out of the house for several dates all of which I loved.

Tomorrow it's back to work and routine. The dogs days of summer are gone once more. I look forward to what next summer will bring. No doubt it will be eventful.

Thank you God for all the life I have lived in the summertime. You are good.